I wrote this 2 months ago and decided to post it in honor of Preemie Awareness Month.
There is a new show on Discovery Health called NICU. It shows different families through the birth of a baby and their stay in the NICU. I watch it, but it's hard. Jacob always asks me why I'm watching it. I'm not totally sure but I think it has something to do with how my sweet babies started out their lives. I can relate. I know exactly how those Mothers feel.
I've never really talked much about my experience because it was too hard, oh and I hate to cry.
I need to write down some of my thoughts and feelings so I can have a record of that journey.
I think after 16.5 months I'm ready to write this down.
Here's how it all started...
April 29th in the evening sometime, it was raining, I had been having contractions all day, nothing new, but these were more intense. I knew I would be 32 weeks exactly the following day. I was worried, I was in pain, I knew it was time to go to the hospital. I told Jacob and we headed out, after the whole annoying process of going through the ER drama we were up in L&D. I was hooked up to the monitors and my contractions were every 3-5 minutes. They immediately started me on the Magnesium drip. I didn't even have time to go to the restroom one last time before they shoved the catheter in. I think it took like 4 times and 2 nurses. UM, not fun!
They started the drip and I remember getting really sweaty, I was so hot, dripping wet, kept kicking the covers off. I remember seeing Jacob shivering over in the corner with hospital blankets all over him. I guess they kept turning down the air for me. It was like 55 degrees, but it felt like 155 to me. I was in and out of a sleepy state all night, occasionally I was feeling contractions but for the most part they were being managed by pain meds.
The next morning, the perinatologist came down to do an ultrasound and check out the babies, it seemed through the night a certain points Brynn's heart rate would fall, so they wanted to check and see what was happening. My OB came in a little after too and said you are having these babies in 30 minutes. I remember thinking we don't even have a camera!!!! We sent out a few texts and made a few phone calls and the anesthesiologist was immediately in the room giving me an epidural.
I was wheeled down to the OR with Jacob close by. I was scared to death, but at the same time completely out of it.
Jacob kept making sure I was breathing because he said I looked dead(thanks honey) (c:
As soon as everything was set up they started the C section, I felt a little pressure, but was really concentrating on hearing my babies cry. After what seemed like an eternity they pulled out baby A, she was crying a little( I loved that noise) it was 11:30am, then what seem like at least 15 minutes if not more they pulled out baby b, he cried a little too, but he did, the Dr again calls out 11:30am. Jacob and I both looked at each other in disbelief had all that really happened in less than a minute. Amazing!
There were Dr's and nurses, the nicu team everywhere, it was crazy. They were over in the corner working on the babies and I didn't have a clue what was happening, all of a sudden I feel lots of pressure and I say, OUCH! The doctor apologizes and says, oh sorry we are just putting your uterus back in and I'm not sure if I said this out loud or not but I said, YOU TOOK IT OUT! LOL! I had no idea they did that.
Pretty soon they bring my cute precious sweet babies by my face for a quick look and kiss and then they were off to the NICU.
I didn't get to see them again for 24 hours. )c:
